THE MAGNIFICENT MOTION LAMP

One of the most glorious cultural icons which reached its zenith in the USA during the unparalleled era of peace and prosperity that was the later years of the Eisenhower presidency (although certain foreign countries and minority groups might have a different description for that time period) was the motion lamp. A motion lamp was a light bulb in the middle of a platform. Above the light bulb was a spike. A plastic cylinder (the"spinner") with vanes on it would be placed over the bulb and on the spike, and the heat of the bulb would cause the spinner to rotate. A larger translucent rigid cylinder containing both an inner and outer wall was then placed over the whole assembly (although in the very early models made in the 1930s, the inner and outer walls were separate pieces). 

The spinner and the inner and outer walls of the rigid cylinder would be perforated, fluted, or painted in such a way that the rotating spinner would create an animated picture when viewed through the rigid cylinder, such as a stream with moving water flowing through a blazing forest fire with flickering flames, fish swimming in a tank, a burning barn, a boy urinating (really), a steam locomotive billowing smoke and passing through the countryside, etc.  If you by now are hopelessly confused by this inartful description, just look at the pictures below.

A hardware or furniture store in the late 1950s would often have dozens of  these lamps on display with their vibrant colors and different types of scenes in motion to create a glorious optical cornucopia--complemented with the sweet aromatic ecstasy of volatile compounds released from the overheated plastic cylinders. The lamps were frequently purchased to place on the top of TV consoles, which sixty years ago usually consisted of a large glass tube embedded in a massive wooden cabinet (I personally would not recommend attempting to put a motion lamp on a modern flat screen television).

  

Although a few of these entertaining illuminating inspirations were manufactured until relatively recent times, most were made prior to 1962.  The use of too hot of a bulb would make their cylinders and spinners warped and brittle, and as a result, their attrition rate during the past half-century has been quite high. The lamps occasionally show up in antique stores (with stratospheric price tags), but to find one in decent shape and working condition is an extremely rare and wonderful event.

To see motion lamp action, click here.

1931 Scene-In Action "Marine Scene"--It
originally sold for $7

1958 L A Goodman "Niagara Falls"--One of the
 most colorful and aesthetic lamps made

A BEAR IS NOT THE ONLY ONE

Photo by Ekasha through Wickipedia

Most of us in the Western Hemisphere have observed nativity scenes--with the classic figures of the Holy Family, wise men, shepherds, livestock, a defecating man, etc. If you are not familiar with the defecating man (or, nowadays, often a woman), then you probably have not viewed the typical nativity scene from parts of France, Andorra, Spain, Portugal, and Italy. These scenes, often featuring the whole town of Bethlehem and not just the stable, frequently include the "caganer"--usually a figure dressed in peasant garb wearing a bright red cap taking a dump. The caganer is generally concealed in a wooded area far from the actual manger, and children are traditionally issued the challenge of trying to find it--sort of like a "Where's Waldo," except that this search probably originated in the late 1600s.

Many theories exist as to why a whimsical irreverent figurine would be usually included in a religious display in the first place. The real reasons are lost in antiquity, but perhaps it is a reflection on the fact that Jesus and his followers are supposed to be concerned with the real world of the poor, the downtrodden, and those whose only toilet is the forest and not a gilded chamber pot manned by a Groom of the Stool. The down to earth simplicity of the pious pooping peasant may reflect a healthy counterpoint to the pomp and opulence of much of organized religion. In many instances, the figure is used for political commentary--a very popular version a few years ago depicted George W. Bush in the typical caganer pose holding a globe. In any event, the Catholic Church tolerates the presence of the caganer in the Catalan regions of Europe and even has one as a permanent fixture (although not near a nativity scene) in the cathedral at Ciudad Rodrigo in Spain.

And then there is the caganer scandal of 2005 in Barcelona. City officials banned the figure from the municipal nativity scene that year out of fear that its inclusion would appear hypocritical in light of a newly-passed civility ordinance which banned public urination and defecation. After much controversy and discussion (including a proposal that all sides could be satisfied by including the caganer but adding a figure of policeman next to him writing a ticket), the City relented in subsequent years, and the official Barcelona caganer is still with us.

For your very own caganer, or books or even a postage stamp featuring same, there is always eBay.

Photo by Ekasha through Wickipedia

THE NEANDERTHAL NABOBS OF NICOTINE

Anyone exposed to western culture is no doubt fully familiar with the antics of The Flintstones. The Flintstones originally originated (I guess that's kinda redundant) on the ABC television network as a half-hour cartoon series from 1960 to 1966. Until Homer Simpson and his gang came along, The Flintstones was the most successful animated program of all times. 

ABC actually sought adults, not kids, as its target audience, and the network was very successful in achieving its goal--much to my chagrin. I missed many an episode of Route 66 as a youth in our one-television household because my dad wanted to watch The Flintstones on a competing channel in the time slot.

Fred, Barney, Wilma, and Betty, the main characters of the show, had a sinister side gig. Specifically, the show was sponsored by a cigarette company, and these prehistoric players had a very successful career extolling the joys of smoking Winstons. For a couple of the many examples of their hawking of this product, just click here. 

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A REALLY COOL TURTLE

Most reptiles and amphibians in northern climates survive the winter by burying themselves in land or in the mud at the bottom of a pond below the ice level and achieving a torpid metabolic status pretty close to death. Almost all of their bodily processes are nearly shut down, and they even stop eating a while before their long rest so that there is no waste material in their colon lingering as a potential source of infection. If you were to dig up a herptile in its winter slumber, it would appear lifeless--at least upon casual observation.

The common snapping turtle (Chelydra serpentina), is an exception to the "total lethargy rule." While snappers generally follow the above procedures of hunkering down in the mud during the cold months and doing nothing, It is not unusual to spot some snappers in midwinter who are not sleeping with the fishes but who instead are actually swimming around in a pond underneath a sheet of ice. Although snapping turtles normally insert their head above water every few minutes to breathe (as they, of course, have lungs--not gills), a snapper in the northern USA may be sealed under ice for four or five months without the ability to take a single breath.

How do they survive? Well, a snapper can absorb a small amount of oxygen from the water through membranes in its throat and mouth in a process called "extrapulmonary respiration;" however, this procedure by itself is often not adequate to provide the metabolic needs of a moving turtle. The creative chelonian will then start burning sugar and fat in an inefficient anaerobic attempt aimed at avoiding oxygen utilization. This process builds up a lot of bad metabolites, such as lactic acid. It is believed by many learned guys that the turtle uses the calcium in its shell as a buffer against the excess acid.

We have had a couple of pet snapping turtles throughout the years (a choice not for everyone--remember they are called SNAPPING turtles). One of them, Arnold, would go in a pseudo-hibernating state each winter and would not feed from October to March. I could never figure out how Arnold knew when winter arrived, as he resided in a large tank in an interior room which had consistent artificial lighting and a consistent temperature all year round.

Oh, and remember how the sex of Nile crocodiles is determined by the temperature of the eggs? Ditto for snappers.

RAPINE SELF-AGGRANDIZEMENT

Although pirate ships are traditionally portrayed as flying a skull and crossbones ensign, many did not. Some buccaneer vessels sported a plain red flag, some had a plain black flag, and some had red or black flags with fanciful designs. The red flag was known as the Joli Rouge ("pretty red"), and this may have been corrupted into the "Jolly Roger" in English.

The black flag did not inspire as much terror as the red flag. The black flag signified that the pirates would accept a surrender and spare the lives of the crew of the target ship. The red flag meant that the attackers would give no quarter and that it would be a fight to the death. You would think that a pirate captain flying a red flag would realize that he is just making his job more difficult, as his prey will be markedly more uncooperative; on the other hand, pirate captains often could be characterized as risk-takers.

For a few examples of the banners employed by historical pirates, click here.

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THE INFLAMMATORY RING OF FIRE PROPOSAL

The estate of Johnny Cash was approached shortly after his death in 2003 with a pitch that his classic tune "Ring of Fire" be used as a jingle for hemorrhoid commercials. Cash's family thought that the idea, despite its inherent whimsy, was degrading to the image of the singer and vehemently nixed the proposal.

Had such an advertisement run, perhaps it would have looked something like this.

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THE CANADIAN-ROMAN SYNERGY

Readers of these Factoids will recall an assertion that Leif Erickson was probably the first European to visit North America--sometime around the year 1000. However, a recent article in the Boston Standard suggests that Leif may have been an explorer-come-lately by several hundred years. Specifically, the finding of an ancient Roman sword (a "gladius") by a fisherman, purportedly from a Roman shipwreck near the infamous Oak Island of Nova Scotia, suggests that Europeans may have visited the New World over a thousand years before Columbus.

This is a story which will require further review as time marches on. It would be interesting, for example, to see what is found if and when the shipwreck is salvaged. In the meantime, however,  J. Hutton Pulitzer, the researcher investigating the sword and surrounding events, states that the following evidence indicates that America might have come perilously close to becoming part of the Roman Empire: Members of the Mi'kmaq tribe, native to Nova Scotia, carry gene markers in their DNA normally found only in those of Eastern Mediterranean descent. Mi'kmag petroglyphs discovered in the 1800s appear to resemble Roman troops and ships. Fifty words in the Mi'kmaq language correspond to Roman nautical terms. A Roman legionnaire's whistle was discovered in the area in 1901. A boss from the center of a Roman shield was discovered in the 1800s in Nova Scotia. Two stones found on Oak Island were engraved with an ancient Eastern Mediterranean script. Gold Roman coins were discovered on the mainland near Oak Island. And, finally, the area contains the invasive plant European barberry (Berberis vulgaris), used by the Romans as seasoning and to prevent scurvy.

While it is cool to imagine that the Romans invaded Canada at one point, one must keep in mind that these latest revelations unfolded conveniently at the very time when the History Channel is hyping its series, The Curse of Oak Island, about unlocking the secrets (including, perhaps, buried treasure) on that piece of controversial real estate.

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DR. SEUSS AT WAR

Theodor Seuss Geisel a/k/a Dr. Seuss was not exclusively a children's book author and illustrator, and his works were often featured in various magazines such as Life and Vanity Fair as well as in advertisements for various products. He spawned the famous insecticide jingle "Quick Henry, the Flit" which would be instantly recognized today by anyone over 80 years old.

During early World War II, Geisel drew over 400 political cartoons for the PM, a leftist newspaper in New York. Most of his messages were pro-Roosevelt and critical of the Axis powers. He frequently denounced entities he perceived as helping the Nazi war effort, including isolationists (especially Charles Lindbergh), Republicans, anti-Communists, and the Chicago Tribune. He was opposed to all forms of bigotry, except in the case of Japanese-Americans, whom he labelled universally as traitors.

Later on in the war, he prepared drawings for the War Production Board and the Treasury Department, and he eventually enlisted in the US Army and produced various training and propaganda films.

Fans of Geisel's children's books will instantly recognize his artistic style in his World War II political cartoons. In fact, they often feature bizarre creatures and elephants very similar to those he drew for the youngsters. If you do not believe me, you can find some of these cartoons by going to the following website or to the very excellent book Dr. Seuss Goes to War and see for yourself.

THE DISNEYLAND DISQUALIFICATION

Originally, the current dictator of North Korea, Kim Jong-Un, was not originally slated by his father, Kim Jong-Il, a/k/a "Dear Leader, Who is a Perfect Incarnation of the Appearance That a Leader Should Have" (his actual title) to serve as Kim Jong-Il's successor in that office. That privilege had been reserved for Kim Jong-Un's older half-brother, Kim Jong-Nam (pictured below).

Unfortunately (or ultimately, perhaps fortunately) for Kim Jong-Nam, he was caught trying to go to Disneyland Tokyo with a forged passport in 2001. He was exiled to the People's Republic of China and has since traveled to numerous countries in the world. His wanderlust may not be as much a product of a playboy lifestyle as a desire to avoid assassination attempts--especially since his brother had no problem condemning their uncle to death and executing him--according to some reports, by machine gun fire, according to others, by feeding him to starving dogs. Anything is possible in North Korea.

The bottom line is, you really have no idea with whom you might be rubbing shoulders at Disneyland.

UPDATE 2/20/2017--On February 13, 2017, Kim Jong-Nam was killed by poison in Malaysia. You are not paranoid when someone really is out to get you.

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COMING OUT ON THE CLOSET

Anyone who makes a habit taking formal tours of American historical homes from the 19th Century or earlier will note than many of these houses--or even mansions--did not have closets in most of the bedrooms or a central closet for overcoats and the like. The explanation provided by the tour guides for this phenomenon is usually something along the lines of "the tax on the house was based on the number of rooms, and each closet counted as a separate room." In other words, like today, where virtually every financial decision is not based on its own merits but instead on the tax consequences, the imposition of taxes influenced architecture and encouraged the construction of dwellings without much closet space.

An internet search will reveal that many persons still subscribe to this theory, while many others maintain that closets were not ubiquitous in the past simply because they were not necessary then where people had far fewer garments, which would fit nicely in a dresser, chest, or armoire. In support of their hypothesis, the tax-theory naysayers often refer to an unidentified study done by an unknown person at an unspecified time which established that there were no such tax laws in the original thirteen colonies. They also cite to examples of specific old houses which in fact had a closet or two.

Well, who is right in this highly emotionally-charged controversy? I don't really know--probably both sides. I do not believe, for a variety of reasons, that  the tax theory should be automatically discarded, including: 1) "Closet" in the old days did not refer merely to a small enclosure built as a component of a room--it was also used as a term for a small room used for prayer, study, or contemplation. 2) Presuming that someone did in fact establish that there were no "closet = room" laws in the tax codes of the original thirteen colonies, that does not mean that such a provision did not arise in other states or territories or that it did not originally exist when the colonies belonged to England (which for sure had weird revenue provisions, such as the dreaded and paneful "window tax" of 1696). 3) The fact that some old houses had some closets does not prove that they were not taxed--only that the owner was willing to take on the tax burden. 4) I embrace and automatically accept as true any and all hypotheses purporting to illustrate how misuse of the power to tax has all sorts of unanticipated consequences.

Ironically, with the advent in modern construction of huge walk-in enclosures for garments complete with windows, electricity, heating/cooling ducts, and furnishings, many closets are now in fact rooms for all practical purposes.

#376--THE KEY TO DETROIT

Since 1702, a revered tradition in the United States (and earlier in other parts of the world) has been the presentation by the mayor of a municipality or his delegate of "the key to the city" to certain select individuals. Although in modern times the key is usually a large prop which does not unlock anything, it still represents an award to an individual whom the city wishes to honor and revere. The prestige of such a tribute is usually in proportion to the size of the city presenting it.

In 1980, Detroit Mayor Coleman Young arranged for the Detroit Key to the City to be presented to the leader of a foreign country. His name was Saddam Hussein of Iraq, who had recently achieved his exalted position by liquidating 21 government officials, including 5 Ministers of the state.

While did Young do this? Part of the reason may have been that Hussein had been donating money to various Chaldean (a Middle Eastern form of Catholicism) churches around the world and had included a $250,000 gift to the Chaldean church in Detroit. What is more likely the primary reason was that, at the time, the USA was really not getting along very well with Iran and wanted to ingratiate itself with Iran's archenemy, Iraq. It is widely suspected that the U.S. Department of State encouraged the presentation of the key in order to suck up to Hussein.

For further info on the history of "the key to the city" as well as the presentation of it by Detroit to a scum-sucking murderous despot, please click here in the Today I Found Out website.

Shakil Mustafa at the English language Wikipedia

[GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html)

 via Wikimedia Commons

THE CARCHARODON COMMUNIST COMMENTARY

One of Fidel Castro's favorite movies is Jaws.  He claims that he likes it because it portrays the evils of capitalism when it depicts the mayor of the town trying to keep the beaches open and the dollars rolling in during tourist season notwithstanding the danger posed by a known man-eating (and woman-eating) shark.

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MOTOR VEHICLE OPTIONS YOU MUST ESCHEW

We have earlier noted that the U.S. government now determines for its subjects what features they must have and cannot have on their automobiles. The following are some of the items on a list compiled by Popular Science of just a few of the contraband things you dare not install on your car but which are available in other countries.

DYNAMIC HIGH BEAMS.  This feature uses a complex array of electronics and sensors to automatically dim the only the portion of the high beam headlights which would blind an oncoming driver in the opposite lane while fully continuing to illuminate everything else. The USA permits only devices which totally shut down all of both high beams--a feature first introduced by Oldsmobile in 1952.

DYNAMIC LIGHT SPOT.  This is an infrared beam which detects pedestrians on the road at night and shines a spotlight on them in time for the driver to see them and take evasive action.

STROBE BRAKE LIGHTS.  These are brake lights which flash rapidly during a panic stop to alert following drivers that they had better consider slamming on their own brakes. A normal slow braking would simply cause the brake lights to glow brightly but not strobe, just like they do now.

REAR-VIEW MIRROR CAMERA. It is illegal in America to replace the interior rear-view mirror with a camera which shows what is behind you--even though the camera could provide a wider view and eliminate the notorious blind spot.

REMOTE-MOUNT MAGNETIC CAMERA. You cannot in the USA install detachable remote cameras to help you see blind spots.

LIGHTWEIGHT SEATS. The government says they are not safe, although I would think that I would rather have a lightweight seat pushing me forward against my seat belt in the event of a crash rather than a heavy behemoth.

ASPHERICAL MIRRORS. These are external mirrors which are curved in such a way as to eliminate the blind spot. 

Click here to see how all of this federal regulation started. 

#373--THE HOLLOW-NECK QUANDARY OF JUNE

Fans of the old TV series Leave It to Beaver (and how could you not be a fan if you have ever seen an episode) still good-naturedly mock the mother in the series, June Cleaver, for her iconic predilection towards wearing a pearl necklace and high heels on occasions where normal women might have a more informal garb while doing the laundry, preparing the meals, or performing any other tasks expected of females at that time. June's fashion choices were not, however, an attempt to glamorize the role of a Eisenhower-era mother and housewife.

With respect to the pearls, the actress playing June Cleaver, Barbara Billingsley, had a hollow depression in the front of her throat. She used the pearls simply to cover up what was perceived as a physical imperfection.

The high heels also have a more pragmatic explanation. In the first season of the show, Billingsley wore normal flats. However, as the boys in the series quickly grew in height, the producers were concerned that the dynamics of the parent-children relationship in the show might appear strained if the kids got taller than the adults at too early of an age. The reason that June Cleaver wore high heels was so that she could continue to tower over her young sons.

To hear from Billingsley's own mouth the explanation for these sartorial inclinations, click here.

Billingsley was typecast for decades as a conservative, white-bread, 1950s mom  whose most challenging crisis was convincing her son Wally not to drink milk directly from the bottle while she and her family lived in an idyllic small town in mid-America. As such, she was the perfect choice for her cameo role in the 1980 movie Airport.

THE 1953 CORVETTE--OFF TO A BAD START

When the first Corvette rolled off the assembly line in 1953, it would not start, much to the embarrassment of GM executives who had invited the press to witness the event.

The executives should have been embarrassed, because the problem was that the assembly team failed to realize that it could not ground an electrical system to a fiberglass car body.

THE GOAT AMBUSH FUTILITY

Have you ever noticed that there is something discordant, if not diabolical, about a goat looking at you? If so, the problem may be its eyes. Goats are unusual in that they have horizontal bar-shaped pupils. These give them great peripheral vision, and a goat can almost see behind itself without turning its head. Optics of this nature are very useful for those animals who wish to avoid a predator having them over for dinner.

Bovines and some birds also have similar pupils, but those of goats, for some reason, seem far more conspicuous.

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