THE FRUIT MACHINE

In the 1960s, the Royal Canadian Mounted Police organized a special department known as Section A-3. Section A-3's sole responsibility was to root out every homosexual in the Canadian government. All such individuals, once exposed, either immediately resigned or were fired.

Section A-3 initially tried to follow everyone around and see what sort of clubs or other social gatherings they attended, but this proved to be an extremely costly and inefficient procedure. What the Mounties needed was a surefire form of gaydar which could be systematically used to test each and every government employee. They found it (or at least believed they did) with a device informally known as "The Fruit Machine." 

The Fruit Machine used a pupil responsive test and also measured perspiration and pulse rate. The subject (who was told that he or she was taking a "stress test") would be shown various pictures of mundane objects along with photos of naked men and women. If the subject's pupils dilated upon viewing a photo of an unclad person of the same sex, the subject would be presumed to be gay. The Fruit Machine examinations were also supplemented with other tests to determine the subject's reaction to trigger words such as "queer," "gay," "drag," and "bar."

It soon became apparent that The Fruit Machine was extremely unreliable. In addition, it developed various mechanical problems. Furthermore, employees figured out the true intent of the test and refused to take it. The RCMP, as a result, forsook using its beloved device. Instead, they brought out a plethysmograph (a/k/a "The Peter Meter") designed to measure blood flow to the genitals to detect any sexual arousal when the subject viewed the photos. Presumably, at this point, the Mounties eschewed any attempts to continue to pretend that they were administering "stress tests." 

At least 400 employees were canned as a result of the RCMP anti-gay crusade.

The plethysmograph, although flawed, still lives on, however. Law enforcement officials in both the USA and Canada use it when investigating suspected pedophiles or ephebophiles.